Autumn Monolouge
by Tio-Chan
Summary: Rule of Rose Jennifer is haunted by dreams of her past. She must make her peace, and decide who it is she loves. OneShot


Disclaimer: I do not own Rule of Rose its copyright of Atlus, inc.

Autumns Monologue

A face stared up in horror at someone who seemed so familiar. It was how she had once dressed, and how her hair had once looked. But it was not her. She shook in her tiny shoes as she took a few steps back from the boy with the brown hair who was holding the rope. Hands released the rope holding the mammoth of a man who crawled on all fours like a dog. She had struggled not to scream. She had tried to get away. Now she was left with just on revelation as she made it out of the house.

The boy had grabbed hold of his own hair and pulled revealing not only that the hair was a wig, but blonde hair that flowed elegantly from underneath. As she stumbled out of the house, a hand reached forward and handed her something. A half smile appeared on the blonde girls face, her special friend, her princess. Wendy smiled at her, sadly though, as Jennifer hefted cold metal in her tiny hands. Her eyes filled with big salty tears that threatened to overtake her vision. Wendy gave one final nod as great arms claimed her from the darkness and she was left alone with a nightmare, and the words that Wendy's final expression seemed to say.

'I'm sorry my prince Jennifer, I made a mistake. Please fix it.'

It was always there that the dream ended. Where she lost her special friends. The hospital room was filled with light, as she cleared her eyes of sleep and looked at the crisp light on the hardwood floor. The first light of an autumn morning, that filled her with a slight warmth and made her forget the nightmares that filled her cold autumn nights. They said that sometimes when one faced what she faced, that things would be hidden away. That only when the time drew close to an end, would she come to terms with. She had almost managed that she thought. But it seemed as though it always ended right there, and the one who had made her lose her special friend, her other special friend, would always be claimed by the darkness, and then no more. She couldn't continue.

She wanted to speak to Wendy.

To find out why she did what she did. Even though it was cruel Jennifer could not think less of her friend, for surely such cruelty could have a truly pure motive?

"I did it for you Jennifer!" A voice echoed in the back of her head, a familiar voice. Wendy's voice, and she looked around frantically for the source. Wendy hadn't come out alive, none of them had. Except for her though sometimes she wished she hadn't.

_// Oh why can't I be what you need?_

_I knew it through a version of me._

_But I'm nothing so good, no I'm nothing,_

_Just bones, a lonely ghost burning down songs_

_Of violence of love and of sorrow, _

_I beg for just one more tomorrow_

_Where you hold me down, fold me in_

_Deep, deep, deep in the heart of your sins//_

She shook her head, there was no one there. Not even her special friend. She couldn't even keep him safe. Though she had tried so hard. If only no one had ever seen him.

"Jennifer!" A voice filled her head again and she looked around frantically to try to find the voice.

"Wendy!?" She asked nothing but thin air and the dust reflected in the autumn light. She gripped the sheets firmly in her hands. Until she almost went white knuckled.

//_I break in two over you._

_I break in two, I need you._

_A piece of me dies._

_And only you can give the breath of life._

_But you don't see me.//_

"I am over here Prince." Came the voice again and Jennifer frantically looked for her friend. Until finally her eyes went wide. Transparent almost glittering in the autumn light, was a girl of about eleven. With wide blue eyes and cornsilk hair a white hat clutched in her hands.

"Wendy?" Jennifer was not sure whether or not she should be horrified or not. But found herself feeling embarrassed for her friend to be seeing her in such a condition. Messy hair, and bags under her eyes from lack of sleep.

"I'm here, Jennifer." She smiled, that same sad smile from the dream. "You need to make peace." She spoke calmly, as though these sorts of things happened everyday.

"Wendy…" Her voice trailed off into silence as she averted her eyes from the blonde haired girl.

Her eyes shot up suddenly filled with anger.

"Why are you doing this to me?" She half screamed, but the rage in her voice evident. "Invading my dreams and stealing sleep from me." She cried now, trying to hide her tears. "I thought you were my friend and you betrayed me, you took away something special, and you took away…" She paused her breathing shallow. "You took me away from home."

_//Here I'm pinned between darkness and light_

_Bleached an undid by these nights_

_Where I'm tossing and tortured til dawn_

_By you_

_Visions of you then you're gone//_

"I did it for you Jennifer." She said in a half whisper. Looking down at the hardwood floor instead of towards her friend. Even in the afterlife she felt herself a coward.

"For me?" Jennifer asked, choking down tears. "For me!?" She almost screamed, fighting weakness to try to stand up and out of her bed. "Bullocks." She growled.   
Wendy seemed un-phased by Jennifer's reaction and instead remained completely still.

"You did not do it for me because otherwise you never would have hurt brown! You never would have had them do such awful things to me! You never would have taken me to that awful orphanage!" She growled as she threw the sheets aside to stand up. Her legs wobbling under the weight of her body, she hadn't done this in a while. Remaining mostly bed ridden and it showed for unable to support the weight she fell to face directly in front of Wendy.

_//The shock bleeds the red from my face_

_When I learn someone's taken my place_

_How can love be so tortured so cruel?_

_When all that I did was for you.//_

"I did those things because I loved you."

She spoke with complete honesty in her small voice as she said this. Her transparent hand moving to hover above Jennifer's loose hair, which hung down around her shoulders. Almost a comforting gesture, had she actually been real. "Loved me?" Jennifer seemed confused. "How could you do that to someone you loved? To something she loved?" She choked back a sob. "You are a liar."

"I though you loved that dog more than me." She said calmly, not looking at Jennifer though. For if she had she surely would have cried. "I didn't want to be replaced." She said her voice wavering.

"It's not fair, why couldn't you have just stayed mine instead of going out and finding that miserable dog?" She sobbed openly after saying this. Her free hand balling up into a fist at the thought of the creature who had taken her place as the center of Jennifer's affections.

"Why can't I love both?" Jennifer asked her voice shaking.

_//I will break in two for you//_

There was a moment of silence between the two of them, where the only sound outside was a redbird chirping outside the window. The Red Bird of Happiness watched over them. But neither of them seemed to notice the reference to their fallen friend as Wendy looked down at Jennifer who had her eyes closed fighting back tears. Why couldn't she love both?

"Then you'll still love me?" Wendy asked breaking the silence with her pleasant sounding voice.

"Yes." Jennifer said softly. Her hands moving to embrace the girl in front of her. But they only moved through the shadow of the girl and Jennifer found herself crying and hugging herself with her hands, gripping herself tightly and sobbing, as Wendy moved to hug her friend, though only letting her hands and arms hover over the other girls head, and pretend to stroke her hair with her transparent hands.

"Make your peace Jennifer."

_//Now you see me._

_Now you don't.//_

It was a dream again. She was standing outside the orphanage gates, and Wendy was looking at her through the bars with large sized tears in her eyes but at the same time seemed to encourage her to go. So she did, turning with one final look back at the girl who was also precious to her. She had someone else to make peace with.

She ran towards the shed where Brown was to be kept, safe from the others. Safe from Wendy. For she could love both of them, but not at the same time. She opened to door to the shed and was greeted by a face she loved seeing. The puppy ran up to her, and she picked him up. He licked her face and she giggled. Then placed him down, and pulled from one of her dress pockets a collar, and a leash. She put the leash around his neck and bid him farewell. Though he tried to chase after her it was in vain, and as she looked upon him one last time she smiled.

'This time, I'll protect you.'

She thought.

Wendy smiled at her from the other side of the gate as the two looked at each other for what would probably be the last time for a while. Wendy's hand reached through the gate and Jennifer clasp it tightly. A genuine smile graced Wendy's features as she began to fade, as did everything else surrounding them. The orphanage, the woods, the shed.

"I made my peace." She said softly to Wendy with a smile.

"You did." Said the fading girl with a giggle. As everything finally went dark Jennifer heard one last thing. "Sleep well, my Prince."

_//Now you need me._

_Now you don't.//_

Jennifer slept peacefully for the first time in a long time.


End file.
